It works almost as well as keeping our sense of humor. When all else fails around here, let’s dance!

LuLu and I often use dancing as our break from school work and our release when the pressure cooker of life starts getting a bit much. I’ve been known to pop in our old Wiggles VHS tape and have the two of us Mash Bananas for a few minutes. It’s hard to be serious when you’re dancing with four grown men in bright primary colors singing kids’ songs.

And if that doesn’t work, we jam to big sister’s show tunes. Yes,... more

Many teenagers in the U.S. foster care system smoke cigarettes. If you have considered older child or teenager adoption, or if you have already adopted a teenager then you are probably aware of this. Today, the “Great American Smoke Out” might be a good day to encourage your teenager to stop smoking. Demanding that your teenager stop smoking won’t work, that will only reinforce the habit. Long lectures about the risk of smoking, the smell, discolored teeth, bad breath, the cost, and the inconvenience probably... more

A couple of months ago I wrote a blog on a Saturday desperately seeking immediate advice from my knowledgeable readers. I thought you might be interested in an update on how it has turned out. The first/birth father of one of our children had just called me that day from jail. He was asking for bail money. Actually, this was the first time anyone had asked me for bail money. I was somewhat at a loss on how to handle the situation, which is why I brought it to my readers for advice.

I had known this man for about three years and to my knowledge,... more

Our family has a sponsored child living in Ethiopia through the World Vision program. An eight-year-old petite girl named Anyme. As with all large agencies, I am sure that they have their negative attributes. However, we can see that our sponsored daughter is receiving an education and needed supplies that she otherwise would not have. A recent photo of her and her father included the family’s prized bull.

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I gotta tell you all about the wonderful parents I have contact with everyday – moms (and some dads) who are volunteering as staff for ATN. Everyday I’m astonished by two things about these people:

1. how they continue to make time to reach out to other families in crisis and to forward the mission of ATN, which is support, education and advocacy for traumatized children and their families. These parents do this even as their own family situations remain challenging. At any given moment one or more of our staff has a child who is placed outside the home... more

One of the highlights of my time at the ATTACh conference was the chance to spend some time with Dr. Katharine Leslie, an extraordinary therapist and adoptive mom of four. Katharine volunteered to teach yoga each night to us true novices. (Just how does she get her body in all those positions?) After one of those sessions, several of us moms headed off to dinner. It gave us a chance to get to know Katharine even better. We all shared quite a few laughs about things that could have brought us tears. But Katharine’s overall message rang clear…that moms especially don’t spend enough... more

I will be sharing in my upcoming blogs some of the more academic things I learned at this week’s ATTACh conference and some of the exciting things in store for the organization that has captured my heart…the Attachment & Trauma Network. But this is about practical lessons learned.

What I Learned on My Trip:

1. Philadelphia is my least favorite city in the entire country. After spending a week there this summer with LuLu (and enduring several meltdowns a day, lots of walking and TONS of noise), I didn’t think I cared for the city that much.... more

Most of us have done it – volunteered to do something with an organization or cause that means something to you. How did it go? Was it a fulfilling experience, one after which you volunteered to do even more ? Or did it leave you feeling confused, unfulfilled, discouraged?

Truth is, doing good for the sake of doing good is a false belief. After spending the weekend listening to Bruce Anderson of Community Activators, I’ve learned that volunteering to help others has much more to do with what it does for you than what it does for the people you’re helping.

Let... more

Our Partners in Policymaking session last weekend was led by Bruce Anderson of Community Activators. Bruce is an insightful trainer, who leads all types of social entities (agencies, non-profits, corporations, organizations) through exploring how to strengthen their organization and the individual members of their organization by recognizing their own gifts and finding gifts in others. The overall goal is to change/recharge communities.

One of the main vehicles for strengthening communities that Bruce promotes is storytelling.... more

Complicated grief treatment has not been standardized according to the article from the Mayo Clinic because mental health providers are still learning about the condition. Mixed results have been seen using various treatments. A new type of psychotherapy called complicated grief treatment, or complicated grief therapy has shown big benefits according to some studies. This therapy is comprehensive and intense. It borrows from cognitive behavior therapy, and trauma therapy.

Part of this... more