I shifted uncomfortably in my seat when the hospital psychiatrist mentioned RAD as a possible diagnosis for LuLu. Not because I’m afraid of that diagnosis by any means. Instead, it’s because I’ve so totally embraced, researched and lived the stuff for so many years that I suspected RAD was NOT what he was seeing in my child. When I asked him to pinpoint the symptoms that would lead him to that as a possibility, he said, because she was adopted internationally.

This worries me a great deal. Those of us who for years have felt like the voice in the wilderness that “RAD... more

The women who own the A4ever Family website have done it again! They have added a fascinating article to their information about Attachment and the Brain. The article is Neurodevelopment Interrupted: Signs and Symptoms by Emily Beard Johnson, Northwest Neurodevelopmental Training Center

The article talks specifically about an area of the brain stem known as the Pons.

... more

Last summer, I drove with my van loaded with baby clothes and baby furniture across the United States, 1067 miles actually, to meet our new daughter. Her birth mother chose a closed adoption, so we weren’t invited to the birth, but the agency called a few hours after she was born. I couldn’t wait to meet her, so I drove straight through, almost 16 hours, and met her just before she was 24 hours old.

Her birth parents couldn’t release their parental rights until the third day, so she couldn’t be released from the hospital,... more

You see an infant banging her head against the wall. Is it normal developmental behavior or an indication of broken attachment? We once had a six month old infant placed in our home that would scream uncontrollably and knock her head against the floor. I ended up carrying her around in one of those infant carriers that you strap on your chest to protect and soothe her. She went back to her parents for a year and then was placed back in our home at eighteen months. Her behavior had worsened. She would pound her head against the wall... more

The second incident of feces painting wasn’t discovered until later in the day that it happened, unfortunately. I had purchased tickets to take all the children to a play at a local theatre. So we all got dressed up, ate a quick breakfast and headed out the door in kind of a hurry. We all enjoyed the play; I think it was about famous American women, so we were in rather high spirits. We stopped off at McDonald’s for lunch on the way home and the day was going great.

Well, as usual, I headed for the laundry room to start a load of laundry. That’s when I found the painting in all of its glory. Spread in lovely chocolate swirls all over the textured plaster wall, again. Only... more

What do you do when your newly adopted child thinks she is Picasso only she uses feces for her art work? Probably my first encounter with feces art may have been the worst. Honestly I just wasn’t prepared, it was so totally unexpected. I was an unseasoned foster parent back then. We had only had four foster children placed with us before she arrived.

It was early morning and I was going from bedroom to bedroom waking up the children for school. I ran into the laundry room to start a load of laundry. You know, when you have eight children, laundry is an all day affair. Anyway, I opened the laundry room door and there it was. Beautiful brown swirls, with the occasional little... more