My daughter, as well as many other people in the world, cannot accept the blame for anything she does. Today, during a discussion about a school assignment that she didn’t turn in, she made the following statement. I have been asking God to help me, but he isn’t! I can tell you for sure, that her behavior will not change, if she doesn’t own her behavior. If she will not take responsibility for her actions then she cannot change them. This has been a major blocking point that has prevented my teenage daughter from improving her behavior.

She refuses to take responsibility.... more

We’re headed to Florida this morning, since Super Dad received a call last night that his father’s health is worsening. Knowing that he’s 91, the news is not shocking. But switching our plans and attention to Grandpa from LuLu is a bit challenging.

And so it is when parenting children with special needs. When “life happens” that doesn’t involve your special needs child, it really DOES involve your special needs child. Super Dad feels the need to visit his dad and to be there. So he needs to go. Oddly enough, he was scheduled to keep LuLu with him on Friday... more

This morning I was running a little late when the phone rang. Even though I didn’t have much time to talk, I answered it anyway when I saw who it was. It was an adoptive mom of six children with at least 10 years of experience parenting special needs children under her belt. We had run into each other at the dentist a couple of months ago and chatted for about 30 minutes about the similarities in our 10-year-old daughters’ behaviors. “Hi Julia, Do you think it would be alright to send my daughter to school with her glasses taped on her face?” I was a bit stunned by her question.... more

In the process of getting caught up in her history workbooks, our 10 year old decided to lag behind in her computer assigned history and science. Apparently, she thought I wouldn’t notice. However, if she considers the last three years of school then she would realize that I would notice, and that I would care. She is a very bright girl so I am not exactly sure why she keeps making these choices, unless it is passive aggressive behavior. I asked her to work on catching up her computer schoolwork while I was delivering mail so that I could have my computer when I got... more

Taking LuLu shopping is always an adventure. You’d think after being in our family for nine years, I’d be able to successfully do grocery shopping with her in tow and not much difficulty. So yesterday we headed out to gather up the food for our party on Sunday. LuLu has taken to wandering off, a behavior that started about six months ago. So I set the expectation up front, before we ever got into the store that she must stay in the same row of the store as I was in or shopping was over. (Yes, I’m prepared to abandon the shopping cart if need be…and I have done... more

It started at 6 am Saturday morning, the time Super Dad rolls out of bed because he’s insane and likes to run eight miles or so with his buddies on Saturdays. He heard this ominous dripping, and upon checking the basement found about 1-2 inches of water all about. The water heater had busted, leaving quite a mess.

Now, I don’t know about you, but we had plenty to do on the weekend before the weekend before Christmas. But our plans quickly changed. It’s interesting how much of your life involves the convenience of hot water. And just how nasty a flood truly is.

We... more

I confess, it hurt and yes, I even cried about it. A mom, who spends one hour every other week in the nursery with me decided to let me have it, with both barrels on Tuesday. She told me that my daughter was a good kid and it was my fault that she was misbehaving. She told me that I was too strict and too critical of my daughter’s work. She pointed out that my daughter sits in the nursery and works diligently every week. She felt that if my daughter didn’t turn in her work it was because she couldn’t do any thing right for me.

I sat there absolutely stunned, mouth... more

LuLu is riding the roller coaster again. Our psychiatrist wisely decided a medication change was in order. I think she’s made the right call this time. But one of the medications we’re weaning LuLu off of takes a long time to back down. It’s one that she’s been on for a few years now (successfully), but it may be causing some other issues with her right now.

So LuLu’s a bit up and down because of all this transition (although I already recognize the med changes are going to be positive ones…her lethargy is gone!) She is also very anxious about her... more

I do realize that it has come down to a battle of our wills. My newly adopted daughter’s strong will verses my own strong and stubborn will. The battle has commenced and we are taking bets on the outcome. My newest adopted daughter has her work cut out for her. I haven’t survived parenting a hundred special needs children over the past 14 years because of fancy techniques or good looks. Nope, it has been by sheer will, determination, and a never say die attitude that got us through the really tuff times.

I tried doing things the easy way. I implored her to follow the... more

LuLu has been out of the hospital for 9 days now, and in the aggregate, as I look back over my copious notes on her behaviors, things have been better. I do believe the addition of the supplements and anti-histamine into her regime has helped. We’ve only had a couple of “flare up” episodes, both of which were quickly extinguished.

But last night, right before bedtime, LuLu engaged in an obsessive, trauma-based behavior that she just can’t seem to stop. (I won’t share it here, because the explanation is long, the behavior is bizarre, and it’s not... more