My friend Nancy reaches the half-century mark today! She’s bound to tell you many things about herself in her own blog over on Reactive Attachment Disorder. But there are probably things she will not tell you...and those are the things I want you to know. First off, in addition to being 50 years on the planet, for the last decade, Nancy has been tirelessly running (nearly single-handedly) the Attachment Disorder Network. Starting locally and now reaching out globally, this network supports families whose children have been traumatized and suffer from attachment issues or Reactive Attachment Disorder. She has been a positive, supportive influence in the lives of so many.

So, on her birthday, I’d like to commemorate her decade at the helm of ADN with the Top 10 Things I Admire About Nancy.

1. Hope springs eternal for Nancy. Despite adopting some very challenging children, in 1999 she took the plunge again, adopting her youngest, Beth, from a disruption. She and Beth deserve all the happiness and healing that has been attained!
2. Her unending commitment to support families in crisis. ADN works hard to return any crisis phone calls we receive within 24-hours. Nancy is a huge part of that commitment, by insisting that we need to be that responsive, but mostly by demonstrating that commitment herself. If you are in crisis and you call Nancy…she will call you back!
3. Her determination to let the world know about the plight of families of traumatized children. Nancy is no wallflower. For this introverted friend, Nancy’s ability to approach strangers with her message and to compel others to action is definitely admirable. Her only mission is to make things easier for families of traumatized and attachment disordered children than it was for her family.
4. Her dedication to friendship. Once you become Nancy’s friend, you know it. She is such a better gift-giver than I am (Your gift will be arriving late Nancy…see what I mean!). I quickly get overwhelmed with life and am really, really bad at remembering things like birthday gifts, thank you note, a little encouragement at just the right time. I think about my friends, but am a bit short on the follow-up action. I sometimes wonder how Nancy does it.
5. Her dedication to family. This is a given for Nancy – an unquestioned tenet – that she is THERE for whoever in her family needs her. Sewing for special occasions, putting together some very awesome memories in videos, cooking with love…she’s there.
6. Her dedication to herself. Sometimes “givers” forget to take care of themselves. But Nancy has learned that self-preservation (especially when your family’s in crisis) is the only way…got to strap that oxygen onto yourself first if the plane’s going down! Nancy walks…a lot. And it keeps her healthy. She takes time to ride her horse, agility-train her border collie, attend her Bible study. Those are activities that energize her. It inspires me to get off my tush and do something…just for me.
7. Her moving ability. Since I’ve known Nancy she’s moved her whole family from Kansas City to Chicago and back again. How she does this without completely coming unglued is a mystery to me. I can’t seem to move from one house to another one 2 miles away without living in complete chaos for the next 3 years!
8. Her wicked sense of humor. And her appreciation of my wicked sense of humor.
9. Her homemade bread. I am downright jealous of what she can do in her breadmaker! Oh well, if I had the darn thing and her recipes, I’d just have to do all the walking she does…or buy bigger clothes.
10. Her willingness to share. Nancy has a great deal invested in ADN, yet as several of us joined her in recent years to help expand the organization, she has graciously shared with us. Her ego is non-existent. She’s listened to our ideas, incorporated our efforts and stayed focused on the mission to bring hope and healing to families.

Right now perhaps Nancy’s thinking that I’ve exaggerated this list a bit or perhaps she’s getting “the big head”. And that’s just fine with me! Yes she has her warts…who doesn’t? But Nancy, dear, you have been a light in the darkness for countless families in crisis. I’m excited about the directions that ADN will be taking in 2007. We’re poised for further growth – reaching and helping more adoptive and foster families and more traumatized children. I can’t think of a better organization to belong to, support and put my volunteer time into.

Happy Birthday my friend!

This is Nancy’s imitation of the unknown burrito…see why we admire her!