Whether the earth is round or the sky is blue truly does depend on your perspective. Or at least it seems so to me lately. ABC did a show on Foster Care entitled Calling All Angels which aired last Thursday night. I unfortunately only saw the first half, as my house was overrun with teenage girls preparing for my daughter's party the next day, and I was pulled away. However, from what I saw the show was making a true attempt to show the reality that some foster children, and the people who care for them, live. It was an honest attempt by mass media to present some basic information about what it is like to be a foster child.

But then, that was my point of view. I watched as the topic came up on a variety of lists I'm on. On the lists where parents are dealing with the challenges of Attachment Disorders and PTSD, the opinions includes those who didn't think the show told enough about the true challenges of parenting and healing these kids. They thought things were sugar-coated and perhaps would result in even more people stepping up to become foster parents (which is a good thing) without a clue about the information and skills needed or access to support (which is part of what's very wrong with the "system" as it now exists), resulting in even more struggling families (which is a bad thing).

On other foster/adoption lists I heard just the opposite...that the show portrayed foster parents/families in a very negative light and made it sound like foster families could/would just "give up" on a child and pass them on to the next placement. They were dismayed by the mention of disruption and were sure that the show would not inspire anyone to call and become a foster or adoptive parent. Just the opposite opinion...

On the ABC message boards about the show you get a plethora of opinions from birth parents, foster parents, social workers, adults who grew up in foster care (and even some very interesting folks who think orphanages should be reinstated...yikes!) Each perspective valid, but each ready to declare someone else at fault for the failing "system" or that the show was inadequate in many ways because it didn't focus on their point of view.

So, was the show good? My point of view is that it was. Early in the show the director of Maryhurst, a girls' group home/treatment facility talked about abuse and basically said that most people can't handle the details of the truth about the child abuse she sees and its effects upon the children she works with. That statement summed up for me as to why the show was only able to present the information that it did. The truth is there are hundreds (thousands) of children in foster care because of abuse and neglect. Sure there are children who have been wrongfully removed from their homes, there are children who do not have trauma issues, there are people in all roles who abuse the system (foster parents, social workers, birth parents, judges). But the effect of abuse and neglect on many, many foster and adoptive children is VERY HARD for us to look at. Many foster and adoptive parents look at it DAILY. The American Public can not comprehend in a 1-hour show what it is like to be these children or the people who love them.

According to the show's statistics, foster children are 2x more likely to have PTSD than Vietnam vets, and 52% of foster children have mental health issues. I don't know the source of those statistics, but they are eye-opening for sure. Some folks would quickly denounce that these numbers can't be true. While I hope they aren't, because that makes the problem HUGE, from my "point of view" they could be...there are so many hurting children and struggling foster/adoptive families out there-- with the effects of trauma at the center of their struggles.

I have a degree in marketing, and the public relations experts have a saying..."Any publicity is good publicity." I think what ABC and Diane Sawyer were attempting to do with this show can be deemed as good publicity for the plight of many foster children and those trying to help them - because it was publicity that life is not rosy in the foster care system and it was from the CHILDREN'S perspective. The system is broken in many ways. Shedding some light on it for the American Public can only help, not hurt the situation. At least that's my point of view...