My teenage daughter loves to “help” me, and sometimes, like today when she helped me clean the house, she is a real blessing. If I give her a task to complete, she won’t stop until she is finished and sometimes even goes beyond my expectations. However, when I am not at home she likes to pretend to be me, and she does what she thinks I would do and orders the other children to help her. When I return home and ask questions, her initial reaction is to lie because she realizes that her plan didn’t turn out the way she thought it would. Then, she gets in trouble for lying.

Sometimes, her lies are almost comical because they are so implausible and because she thinks, her parents will believe them. Like the times when it is obvious, that she is the culprit because of overwhelming evidence, not only that, but there are always witnesses in a house with 10 people living in it. However, she hasn’t yet made this cause and effect realization, so she continues to play the game, even though she always has consequences for lying.

One time, while she was attending public school, she forgot to have me sign a permission slip for tasting ethnic foods. She signed my signature as “Mom,” and in the comment area she wrote, “She ain’t got no alergees.” She didn’t fool her teacher, who later called home to tell me about it.

She stole nearly 200 dollars from my purse, periodically taking bills to school to purchase things, to assist her keeping friends. When we found out about it, she maintained for days that she had earned the money herself at school, selling drawings that she had made for 10 cents each. Trust me; she isn’t an artist so she didn’t fool us for a second.

Another thing that baffles me is why the other children listen to her when she tells them what to do, or why they just stand by and let her do something completely foolish. After all, they can’t wait to tattle on her when I get home. Sometimes, when they are tattling she will stand there and argue with them, as if they don’t know what they are saying.

My seven year old tattled on her last week and apparently, he had advised her that she was making a mistake. She argued with him in front of me, finally saying to him, “You didn’t see me, because you went into the playroom when I did it.” Then she actually thought she had won the argument.

Related Links:
Cutting Things-Living With FAS
I Forgot - Living with FAS/FAE
My FAS Child Can’t Stop Stealing