One of the “signs” of healing or progress, we’ve been told, is a developing sense of humor. Children who are able to “get” jokes are progressing developmentally and emotionally. The first time LuLu understood something was funny and laughed (only a couple of years ago), was a monumental occasion.

Since then, LuLu has tried to figure out “what is so funny” about a variety of things we laugh at. As a family, we’re hooked on humor. It’s what keeps us sane. We prefer comedies to other types of movies, watch stand-up comedians, read the comic strips. We have long-running inside family jokes that endure decades, even generations. Both Super Dad and I grew up in families that laugh…a lot! And one of the traits each of us cites that drew us together was…”He/she is so funny!”

One of the things that bugs LuLu is that she doesn’t find adult humor (I’m not talking R-rated here) funny. And it worries/confuses her. “I don’t know why you’re laughing, Mom,” she’ll say.

A few weeks ago she admitted that “Sometimes I only laugh because the adults are laughing.” I remember those situations as a child. Wanting so desperately to fit in, to get the joke…and laughing even though I had no earthly clue what the grown-ups thought was so funny.

For LuLu it produces enough anxiety that she sometimes acts out behaviorally. And face it, there is no way to explain adult humor to a 10-year-old.

But last night, we were having one of those conversations where LuLu is really “thinking” about something and processing it. She brought it all up.

“Mom, adults think different things are funny than kids, don’t they?”

“Yes, they do. What do kids think are funny?”

“Pooting and burping,” she giggles.

“Yep.”

“But you don’t think that’s funny, do you?”

“Not really.”

“I don’t understand what grown-ups think is funny. But I guess other kids don’t either (her effort to not get agitated about feeling left out of the joke.)”

“That’s right, I didn’t understand what was so funny to my parents when I was 10.”

“What is so funny to grown-ups, Mom?”

“Well grown-ups often laugh at what someone says, because it could have more than one meaning or it seems silly to them.”

“And kids laugh at poots,” she replied. “You don’t think poots and burps and America’s Funniest Videos are funny, do you Mom?”

“Not as funny as you do, dear.”

“Why not?”

“I guess I’m over it.”

I went on to explain that your sense of humor grows up, matures. And that 10-year-olds think different things are funny than toddlers and babies do.

“What do babies think is funny?”

I made a silly face for effect. “This. Sometimes they just start to giggle at faces like this.”

“I’m over that, Mom,” she replied indignantly.

And so it goes, LuLu dissecting each aspect of life as she analyzes and processes things. What an interesting child I have! And what interesting things we have to directly address. Nothing is learned by her through quiet observation – but instead has to be directly addressed and thoroughly examined. Why, why, why…she asks.

I can hardly wait for the discussion about why men find The Three Stooges funny. Super Dad will have to explain that…because I certainly do not get it!

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