For a few months now, LuLu has been working on "staying on the positive path". This visualization exercise was of her own design. She was introduced to visualization by her attachment/trauma therapist in January. And LuLu is a quick study and eager to try.

But the negative thoughts that greatly outnumber all other thoughts quickly thwart most efforts she has at keeping a positive outlook. This negativity is so ingrained that it has to be embedded right there in her neurological wiring. I mean this is a child who when her pants get too small complains (make that whines and rages) that she's too fat or growing too fast, but if the new pants she tries on in the store are too large, there's an immediate meltdown that she's a baby! Poor girl spends her life sabatoging herself on every little thing.

It's hard for me -- a realist with optimist leanings -- to deal with all this negativity. I have had to separate her negative outlook from who I am and realize there is little I can do to change this, but remind her of which path she's headed down. Had there been this many negative vibes from any other human being (including my spouse) that I've known, I'd have dumped the relationship with that person a LONG time ago. But with LuLu, it's not that simple.

So, the visualization she came up with is that her negative thoughts are like the interstates in Atlanta, wide, smooth and fast moving. It's easy to get on and go fast as you can into the world of negativity. And she does this with alarming frequency. But LuLu wants to take the positive path. Right now the positive path looks either like an overgrown walking trail in a dense forest or she sometimes describes it as a bumpy gravel road. It is not a superhighway...not yet.

LuLu's visualization includes thinking positive thoughts and that causes the cement trucks to come pour the foundation and the workers to smooth out the surface. Over time, she tells me, the positive path will be an interstate too.
And the negative path, if she refuses to travel down it, will become full of potholes and eventually a small overgrown trail. Pretty good visualization, huh?
I've gotta give LuLu credit. She's trying. Today she spent most of her day on the positive path. There was only one brief meltdown right before dinner (she was hungry). But then back with the positive thinking.

I can't tell you how huge this is for LuLu. This girl's entire world view is "glass half empty" - heck, she's sure the glass is broken and the water is contaminated! And her view of herself is equally low.

"Gosh you're having a good day," I noted. Then she did it -- she shot me a GENUINE smile. One with real JOY attached. Gosh, I can hear those cement trucks pulling up now! Get out the orange barrels, we've got a highway to construct!