By pure accident, LuLu and I tuned into this show, Private Worlds: Kids and Autism, Sunday night. We were both captivated. LuLu, with her quintessential OCD, immediately insisted, “Mom, put the remote down, please. I don’t want you changing channels, even during the commercial.”

She was immediately covered with the feeling of watching kindred spirits on TV. Oddly enough there are many who would say she’s not autistic. But darn if LuLu doesn’t clearly identify with these kids. “He’s flopping like I do,” she commented. “He is making more nonsense noises than I usually do,” she observed.

I can’t quite describe the mixture of joy and pain I experience watching shows about kids with hidden disabilities sitting next to my child who has hidden disabilities. She was glued to the set, barely breathing. It was as if she was realizing for the first time that there were others in the species like her. It was very much the affinity she feels for other disabled children, and exhibited last week at the doctor’s office.

But I’m saddened too. First of all it pains me to watch her take in the pain and struggles of these “different” children. And at the same time, it pains me that shows on disabled children are so rare, that it is a novelty, and that somehow adds to the feeling that she’s not “normal”. The message of the show was overall a positive one, showing autistic children interacting with others. Their siblings did much of the talking. At one point I turned to Super Dad and said, “How many high school girls use the term ‘neurotypical peers’…besides our daughter, of course!” But we were definitely in our element, watching this show.

I couldn’t help but think that overall this was a positive thing, a self-esteem builder. To know that others have challenges and struggles that mirror hers is to empower her to do the things they are doing. And to empower her to self-advocate and know, it’s ok to be differently-abled.

Here’s an article about the show.


Here’s the show’s organization sponsor: Autism Speaks